Lemony Snicket

i tried to share this on twitter but there are too many characters:
Author description for Lemony Snicket:
'Author Lemony Snicket is a broken man, wracked with misery and despair as a result of writing A Series Of Unfortunate Events. He spends his days wandering the countryside weeping and moaning, and his evenings eating hastily-prepared meals. '

LOOOL <3 nbsp="nbsp">

my childhood summed up. Mr Snicket, what a wonderful man you are. 

this was on the dymock's website. he has a new children's book coming out.  

oooOOOOOoooOOooOOoOoo

hello darling. i amback. exam studies seem to be going okay so i have decided to give myself time off to bludge and blog.
today i was watching videos about society's vampires, ghosts and supernatural entities. I have never believed in it. Like ever. Ever. I don't really believe what is not tangible. Seeing is believing! my one exception being God. but even then, i only truly put my faith in God after reading the bible as a child, and feeling a 'connection' of sorts.
but other than that, anything supernatural can kiss my ass. i just find it so ridiculous. there is no fool proof hard evidence and yet so  many people walk around so confidently declaring their close encounters with the haunted. we are just humans. how can we be anything other than human? :/ and why the hell do all ghosts just randomly knock shit over? == where is the point in that? LOL. 'yeah EVERY NIGHT, MY PANTRY DOOR GETS OPENED :O'. yes, i am a ghost out to open your pantry door every night. you better watch out! one day its gonna be your window im opening!

tehre was this other video where the guy with his 'ghostbusters' (yes its their actual occupation) walk into this supposedly haunted house. and they holler at the ghosts going 'COME GET US, COME SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT MATE' lol and then one of the guys goes 'omg my back feels like its burning! check it for me guys!' and he opens his shirt and lo behold, there is thismassive burn mark on his back. he gets it checked up and it turns out to be the sign of the devil! :O if ghosts were real, they were once human, why so mean to other humans?

i dunno, everything just seems too cliche to be real. Super creepy scenery, brave men, darkness and moving objects. it all seems like a cheap scare.
lol ive just been reminded of a year 9 camp, where i stood outside a cabin with hair over my face and a torch under my head. LOLOL good times.

but seriously, why cant ghosts do something else for a change? dont go opening pantry doors and dropping spoons on the floor. make me a sandwich.
which reminds me, thre was this other video where this ghost hunter lady walks into the haunted house holding some human device that records noise, and she goes 'WHO ARE YOU?' and then you hear 'sjalkdrjhga;lejglerjgrajghlerjgkladjgfljsglarjgekj' as a reply. The translation is 'My name is Mark' == like seriously? you got a name from static? and then she goes "how did you die" which was folllowed by more static which translated to 'suicide' etc.
Many argue that its the spirit that lingers, seeking peace or whatever. they talk of spirit being a seperate entity to humans. and yet the spooking images of ghost look like humans, with a head, arms, legs and shit LOL. what makes our species so special that in death, we can still stay on earth?

There was this other video that showed CLEAR EVIDENCE OF THE PARANORMAL which was this caught footage of a 'mist'. they  used this machine that detects image as well as temperature. becuase you know, ghosts have a temperature. and basically they caught this image of a white mist by this table and that mist had a temperature of like 20 degrees. I got to admit, at that point i was like 'oh wow, who am i to know if the supernatural exists. maybe there is something out there'. but then in this other video of CLEAR EVIDENCE OF THE PARANORMAL, they caught a similar image of a mist at the end of a hallway except the temerpature went UP when it hit the entity. so now it just looks like a massive fraud. and whats even funnier is that the people went 'MATE, WHEN WE SAW THAT, WE HAD TO GO BACK TO SEE MORE' so they went back, set up a camera etc. and they managed to catch an image of the ghost's head peaking out from behind the wall for a split second before hiding behind the wall again. LOL. what a shy ghost. randomly popping its head out to look at the humans. which means it has eyes. that work. how does that work? which means it must have a brain to register what its seeing. and have memory to understand what the brain registers. unless they have none of that and get really creeped out by humans and so must try and defend its territory. but then that doesnt explain why people claim they communicate and talk and understand english. What if there was a ghost that couldnt understand english? HOW DOES ANY OF THAT WORKK. how can a ghost know anything hwen it is literally nothing. and how can a camera catch nothing?

i dunno, anything caught on camera just looks fake to me becuase it can be so easily adjusted. especially when its coming from people so eager to show off thier footage of the supernatural. and how is it even visible? how can we see matter that is not there? and why does it only 'become visible' for a glimpse or two?
Like come on mr ghost, if you can close a door, have the decency to use that strength and show your face.

in my opinion, it is a cruel, cruel world. if you die from a cruel death, it does not give you a warrant to haunt this earth. you dont get that opportunity. life is not like a time slot you are assigned to fill out. and just because a place gets a lot of kills, doesnt mean theres a massive concentration of ghosts making it easier to find one ==. why dont we see ghost pigs in abattoirs then?
but i guess we will all know the truth when we die.

if i were a ghost, im not gonna do mundane shit like dropping stuff and shutting doors. ill whistle. maybe ill try and bite into a cake so humans can watch cake getting chewed and digested in thin air. or maybe ill dance and sing for them. and plant pretty flowers. and do random shit that will make it more obvious that i exist and im not out to be your typical ghost.

footage and films

hi blog! i am taking a break from unorganised, sporadic cramming, to think about anything other than drugs and food.
but i hav enothing to say to you :( my brain and every cell in my body.. hey that oculd be a start to a poem.

My brain, and every cell in my body,
sings.

lol im not gonna continue that for fear of creating the worst poem in history. and im certianly not singing right now, becuase my nose is soooo blocked. i feel like im a diver under the ocean. you know how they sound really weird when they talk because no one ever has decided to invest in high quality technology?
Which reminds me, you know that Felix guy that fell from space? how come the footage was sooo crappy? my iphone can do better, which must mean they've used some camera from before i was born. the same applies for like..every footage ever of any bad shit that has gone on in this world.
'CATCH THIS ROBBER' *shows extremely pixelated video* = =. 'SUPER IMPORTANT BUILDING HAS BEEN DEMOLISHED AND EXTREMELY IMPORTANT PEOPLE HAVE BEEN KIDNAPPED' *shows pictures of a blurry blob in a blurry background*
how does a phone whos main function is to call have better quality videos than a camera whos function is to film?
But to be fair, maybe cameras get super shitty when theyre travelling fast. But still.

*woosh - choppy, sudden, awkward transition*
toy story was on tv yesterday. toy story one AND two. i remember being so excited i could burst as a child when cartoons aired back to back. now all i do is reminisce like the old fart i am. but yeah i watched some of the toy story. and everything was just soo cute. but i couldnt help but notice really weird things that i never noticed before. like how woody was really tempted when that mary sheep shephard (whatever she is) suggested he drop by her place with a wink. i was like WHAT ARE THEY DOING! KIDS SHOW! CODE RED!
but then all the innocent colours and simple words calm you down.

i should probably get back to studying now. and making myself some noodles. LOL i keep eating spicy noodles as soon as my throat gets better, which makes them feel like sandpaper the next day. ITS AN ENDLESS, TORTUROUS CYCLE. MAMMA MIA PIZZA PIE, but bye.

What the f*ck.

So disgusted by humanity right now. I know its in our nature to have flaws, to be malicious, jealous, unfaithful, unhappy, narrow minded etc. but surely we have our limits right? Because THE LAST TIME I CHECKED, ITS NOT COOL TO BE MAKING 'HILARIOUS' MEMES ABOUT DEATH BY SUICIDE.
This isn't even about being self centered, or being bullies, or being stupid, this is just being absolutely vile and feral. Who knew 'normal' human beings in society could react so casually to MURDER, with the culprit being society itself. That is messed up and psychopathic. We are so cold hearted.
Like how can you laugh or joke about suicide? I don't understand that thought train. I've long accepted suicide, bullying and harassment (among other horrible things) as a part of human relationships- the dark side, but to actually find humor in that? Just how do you do that? And to think that these people are MY age. And they're going to graduate and become doctors, engineers, business(wo)men and whatnot. Like omg. What if in the future, depressive deaths being mocked becomes a norm?

I'm referring to Amanda Todd who took her life after being stalked, bullied and assaulted. I'm affected by her story and I'm really enraged by the world's reaction, especially my generation. Because we're going to be shaping the future when we grow up. And the message this sends out is 'LMAO, we are going to bully you and don't even think about dying, we will only make it a worldwide case of bullying'.
And I'm not being ignorant, I know that bullying has ALWAYS been an issue, and many have taken their lives because of it. I also know that this is happening as I type this, and that no matter the efforts, it can't be eradicated. But don't hate just because I and many others are reaching out to Amanda. Like far out, I just want to swear and swear and swear. What the actual fuck is wrong with this world?
I don't think this is even a matter of educating or raising awareness or looking out for one another etc. Just have the decency not to be such a fucking moron. I just wish someone could snap their fingers and suddenly it won't be such a cool thing to assault the crap out of people who don't please you.

KLGJELRAHJLAERFKMDSNBLRJGLR far out we should be ashamed of ourselves. But not even remorse or shame can undo the harm done.

And as a side note, why don't we look down on those boys that flash their manhood on the net instead of a girl who flashed her chest under the illusion that the guy had cared for her?
Lots of girls go online to have a giggle over guys flattering them or baring them a naked penis. 'ewwwww *blush giggle* gotta tell my bffls!'
Lots of boys go online to be cool and be all 'yo homie, flashed these girls HAHAHAHA THEIR FACES, IT WAS HILARIOUS!'
I personally don't give two fucks for those that do that, go ahead if that's how you want to use your dignity. But since we're all taking score of each other's actions, I'm calling out to the lot that flash for giggles, that ask for flashes, anyone with a mistake. JUST ANALYSE EVERYONE'S FUCKING MISTAKES. I will eat my shoe if someone comes out with no scars.


       

Sometimes I'm foolish

Do you ever get the feeling where you want to win? Where you need to win?
I want to win, but I'm up against nothing. I don't even put myself against anything. I just want to win lol. So begins the vicious cycle of thinking stupid thoughts in an attempt to win over myself. And then realising what I'm doing ==.
I saw something weird today. It's not weird. But it was weird for me. It put shit into perspective. Like when you look at a photo for too long and then everything starts looking ugly. (Am I the only one who gets that feeling?) But back to that weird thing, yeah, I saw something weird that wasn't really weird- but weird for me, and I kind of realised that I did not care and yet I do care. But I'm just feeling weirded out, and that need to win. Weirded is not a word..thank you Microsoft word. I always both love and hate everything. I want to push away and yet I want to grasp on tight. I want to shut up and yet I want to keep on talking. I feign not to care, and yet I notice.

I'm that girl who's crying inside! Who's heart is so broken from all those sleepless nights crying because no one can see her inner beauty! I'm joking. I just felt like I started sounding like those soppy meme's written by girls who are 'strong and holding back the tears'. LMAO please shoot me if I ever start sounding like that.

But yeah, then you make my day. Not you, but you. Yeah, that one. You ALLL make my day hahaha.

BTW, I HANDED IN MY LAST ASSIGNMENT OF 2012. AND IS IT JUST ME OR WAS THIS THE ONLY ASSIGNMENT I HAD THIS SEMESTER? My memory fails me constantly. If I'm ever before the court, don't show them I said that. :P Actually, I could probably work that in my favor.

I cannot wait till holidays! Going to explore the ends of the Earth and tie it all into a tight little bundle in my heart <3 .="." 4="4" :=":" a="a" an="an" and="and" anywhere="anywhere" attic="attic" away="away" because="because" body.="body." bone="bone" desire="desire" do="do" don="don" entail.="entail." even="even" explorer="explorer" feel="feel" from="from" go.="go." go="go" have="have" holiday="holiday" home.="home." i="i" idea="idea" in="in" is="is" it="it" joke.="joke." last="last" like..in="like..in" like="like" lock="lock" make="make" massive="massive" maybe="maybe" me="me" melbourne="melbourne" my="my" nah="nah" nbsp="nbsp" never="never" no="no" not="not" p="p" single="single" sucks="sucks" t="t" that="that" the="the" to="to" too="too" travelling="travelling" up="up" was="was" what="what" will="will" would="would" year="year">
Haha look at me, blogging about me. 

Edit: Yeah look at what my blog did to my paragraph. Take from it what you will. Tis alienspeak.

Le Rant

I am going to complain about people who complain about people who complain first-worldly. I haven't really noticed it around me, but I've seen it a lot all over the internet.
#firstworldissues I remember back when that was funny, light and understated. Not over-hyped by Gen Y.
Now its like some twisted trend to tell people who complain about first world issues to suck it up, get over it, 'There are people worse off than you, you selfish brat'. It's trendy to talk like you care for the poor with all your heart. It's trendy to be charitable, all-giving, down to earth and wise. Have you noticed that? (Or am I just reading people wrong again? Don't hesitate to tell me)
Being above all that #firstworldissue 'bullcrap' seems to be really in. Even nigahiga has joined the bandwagon with his video that has viewers going 'omg yeah suck it up people.'

Which, quite frankly, I find stupid. If we lived our life taking everyone's misfortunes into consideration...who would have a house and a meal every night? If we take everyone's life into accountability, we cannot live. Is it our fault if we were born into a society that can afford to shelter and feed us on a daily basis? If someone ordered hot coffee, and they receive it cold, you can't just go -_-' when they raise that point. It seriously isn't that big a deal. No need to go, 'omg honey, you know, in some third world country, they labored over those beans in your coffee?' (And then they go off and end up complaining about something just as trivial) We've adjusted to an environment where we don't have to question the availability of basic needs, so naturally, we focus ourselves on other things, which = different problems. I don't see the issue there. So I don't get it when people get all 'urgh, so inconsiderate' *walks past volunteer collecting money, buys gum* like lollllllllllll. It's like standing in front of a homeless man going 'oh how I care about you so much!' and then walking off again.
If you find it annoying when people complain about things that a third world person wouldn't, then it would be pleasing if you can take that time you use complaining and donate it those in need. Since you care so  much.
And stop complaining about people who raise any issue in their life. Like urgh, geeeez, that's so first world of you. Not cool man. *flail*

But seriously, I'm not going to scorn someone just because their life is good enough that their major complaint is the bad weather. And I bet if we suddenly all went 'urgh, so much poverty in this world! >:(', they're gonna sit there in a comfy chair and complain that no one's doing anything about it.


Having said all that, I'm not being inconsiderate of the less fortunate. I don't condone reveling in luxuries and I certainly don't support ignorance of the world's issues of poverty etc. But with issues like that, its pro-activity that counts. You don't get places- and poverty certainly gets nowhere- by looking down on people who don't suck it up. So if you're thinking how uncool first world issues are, either keep your mouth shut or help combat third world issues.

(And no, preaching the existence of poverty does not do shit. You'd have to be living under Uluru if you didn't know it is very much present in not just third world, but in first world countries too.)

BR: Lola and the Boy Next Door - Stephenie Perkins

I read this book some time last month after Anna and the French Kiss but I didn't feel anything strong enough to write about it lol. But I can't seem to write this essay due next week because no words are coming out so I've decided to do a little blogging foreplay. (:O what did I just say?)
This book is a companion novel to Anna and the French Kiss and it did not live up to its preceding story.
It has short cute cameos of Anna and Etienne though.
Anyway, its about this girl , Lola, who basically lives to be different. All her classmates think she's weird as f*ck and she wants it that way. She embraces individuality. Every morning, she gets up, puts on a wig, a new face of make up, some weird costume, and out she goes. Andddd, lol I can't remember much of this novel..
One day, this boy she used to crush on as a child returns to her neighborhood. She fights her feelings for him, but when she goes through issues with her equally as unique boyfriend, she starts doubting her heart and herself blah blah etc.
I wasn't a massive fan of Lola. I don't get how trying sooo hard to look different everyday makes you different. I just see that as try hard and pathetic. And what does that say about her self esteem? Is it healthy to wake up every morning and shove on a blue wig and a ballgown? But everyone is different I guess. What does my judgement of Lola say about me? What is so different between me chucking on heels unnecessarily and her chucking on a wig unnecessarily? We all know not everything we put on is for comfort. I just don't like that Lola goes to such extremes to be different. Being different shouldn't be your goal. That should come naturally. And being normal shouldn't be your goal either. That's unattainable. She just seems like she's investing her entire life into looking indie. Like come on, someone needs to go give her a hug and tell her she's beautiful just the way she is. She needs to listen to some Bruno Mars.
Another thing I did not like about Lola was how her life, from what I recall, seemed to evolve around the boy next door. His name is Cricket by the way. (Do I need to make a point of that?) I don't like it how her mood lifts and falls like a tsunami whenever boys step into the scene. She's a mess hiding behind a mask. Quite literally. She needs to have some independence and happiness within herself. Don' let no man ruin your life gurllll. And it would be understanding if she went through some change throughout the novel and came out a beautiful girl who we could actually understand, but no. She stays the same old Lola - with a new face and new hair every. single. day. I lived the entire novel through her eyes, and I still go 'Who is Lola?'

Cricket was sweet. *cricket chirps* lol kidding, but he was your typical boy next door. Shy, sweet, enamored by Lola and her whacky ways. Lola was attracted to him because he dressed differently. That girl is obsessed with individuality ==.
Anyway, that pretty much sums up all I have to say about the novel. I have nothing to say about the plot-line because there wasn't really one. And the writing wasn't horrible nor extraordinary.

See now I feel bad because did I really need to say all that? I bag novels too much. But to put it out there, I loved Anna and the French Kiss. This was just a disappointment. Lola, oh Lola.