meet my GP, and my worst nightmare

hi blog. im not gonna teach you shit today because my AMH is too far away. (and thus begins the end of continuous self-learning)
im also irrationally angry because my good friend told me to get on steam to TF2 SO I DID AND IVE BEEN WAITING FOR 5 MINUTES ON MY LAPTOP FOR NO REASON. ive upped it a notch and turned on 2PM's Tired of Waiting.
let me instead tell you about my week. its been shitty but im gonna pretend its not. becaues i should be happy im not down for a genuine cause. id rather be sad for no reason that sad for a reason. makes sense ne? i should be crying tears of happiness and relief.
i made WONDERFUL use of my sparse free time by going to my local GP. i had CT scans and an MRI done like...LOL months and months ago and decided now would be a good time to go and have him tell me about my fabulous brain. dayum shake that medulla.
i dont think he even remembered about my scans cause he just stared blankly at me for 5 seconds then told me all is good (its love)
so i asked him how come my seizures happen like all the fucken time now, and he just WITHOUT A WARNING BEFOREHAND starts tapping my face and my arms. and being ticklish makes me look like the biggest douchebag. he ruled out strokes and heart attacks. which i beat him to like what over a year ago? get wid it. so then he starts trying to fix me. and like every other time, he's all for trial and error. it went something like this
GP: you might just be imagining all of this, because you feel that your condition opens you to such symptoms you naturally start feeling those symptoms
me: but i dont have a condition, so why would i start randomly imagining shit. IM HERE BECAUSE I WANT ANSWERS
GP: oh yes. which is why that reason is highly unlikely and probbaly not it at all.
me: gj
*at this stage he converts to vietnamese*
GP: the electricity currents between your nerves may be unregulated, affecting your sympathetic nervous system
i have no idea what that means. is he talking action potential? it gets better
GP: it may be that you are forgetting to breathe.
i am in uncontrolable fits of laughter. but my mum who was there says that ive never breathed properly like ever. apparently my breathes are too shallow and unfulfilling and uneven. it gets better.
having 'honed' in on this diagnosis, he then asks me more questions for more indicators. he told me to stop using my asthma pump too much.
i said mate, i do not have asthma. YOUVE GOT MY HISTORY THERE IN FRONT OF YOU TAKE A READ OF IT
at this stage, i decide to fill him in on my life. so i told him about my nightmares, my retarded feelings and how im like dizzy all the time. its the weakest ive been.
GP: uyen, you are going through a break up.
me: no im not
GP: are you sure? maybe it was a facebook relationship. its taking its emotional toll on you. your blood tests show youre deficient in everything. these are all indicators that young girls like yourself go through when they break up!!!!!
me: no im not out of any relationship. and im not stressed. and those blood tests are a year old..
GP: OH RALLLY? LETS HAVE ANOTHER ONE.
and that was basically the consultation. i feel very looked after. as if he even needs to debate with me my relatinship status. oh and as the appointment was drawing to a close, he told me to stop thinking.
oh yeah dr, just give me a sec while i stop thinking ==. LOL
I WAITED TWO HOURS, FOR THAT. and its not like its the first time this has happened. the last time, igot pissed so i switched to his wife instead, but she didnt have my records and she was so blunt and robotlike that i got scared.

but whatever. i still respect my doctor and trust him just sometimes i want to URGHHHH. but okay, whatever. if you wish to stick a bandaid on every wound before the antiseptic, so be it.

and have you met my worst nightmare? i had it again. its a cracker this one.
i dreamt that i lived in this..village-that for those that have read Frankenstein, had that kind of feel. very olden day, and everyone was pooor LOL. but anyways, i was poor too. and there was a grand dracula-like vampire who lived at the hill of the village, in his scary castle. i know, it sounds soooo cliche. like someone sue her for copying every vampire movie out there. but anyways, this vampire 'fell in love' with me. and it was all dandy and i was head over heels and light with happiness and joy.
now this vampire was very 'theatrical' in his feeding. he liked to be flamboyant and have a grand scare and just mess with everyone. he wanted his towns people crazy. whenever he needed to feed, people would run screaming like mad men, with torhces lit by stick of wood (lmao) and itd be your classic horror movie scene. except id be happy, because he loved me. it was weird LOL. and i had mud smears on my face cuase i was poor.
anyways one night, when he was hungry, he went on his usual dramatic kill. and i was standing on the sidelines watching everyone run like crazy with a weird smile on my face. and then for some reason, his chosen victim was ME. i still remember the crushed feeling i had. like SOOOO heartbroken. me? ME? I THOUGHT HE LOVED ME! that kind of feeling.
and he said that because we had something special, it is only right that my death be supreme to the rest. i was petrified.
he decided he wanted to have a really hearty meal and savour killing me. so he made this game, which i dont really remmeber, but it basically ended with 3 numbers displayed in the air..LOL. because thats totally possible.
the numbers weree 67, 123 and i dont remember the third. by now the entire village was surrounding me, as if entranced in a spell of sadism. and the Count said that the numbers represented how many litres of blood he was going to inject into me. and i got soooo scared, but for some reason i could NOT move at all! so he LOL he got out a blood transfusion thing i saw in city hunter, and put 67 litres in me. and i felt sooo bloated, and my skin had cracks in it with blood seeping through, splurting in some places. and i was throwing up blood and it felt horrible and painful. and then he put 123 L in and i felt as if every part of my body and every cell was under sooo much pressure and i was basically just a sponge, soaked in blood. blood everywhere. blood in every crease of my body, every cell every atom. i could not move and i felt so soggy and gross and just bloody, he went in for the kill.
and then i woke up.