having no home

i rarely see anything that touches the very bottom of my heart. but on monday i did. i was all pissed off cause some people dont know how to rock up on time 100% of the time but seeing this just threw me off my high horse and broke me apart.
there was a homeless woman on the floor covered in all these different rags fighting to stay warm against the brutality of cold winter. and i admit, i'm quite used to seeing homeless people. its probably safe to say we all are. but next to this woman was her pet dog. it was in its own basket covered its own rags and together they were just sleeping, their heads tucked under more rags. it tore my heart right open (not literally). there was a hat in front of them with about $2 of measly coins. and there were two signs. one asking for money to feed her dog. and one asking to feed her. even now, the image haunts me. it haunts me so much.
ive grown up knowing about homelessness. but i never really took to heart before that these people once had a home, and they once were loved, and that htey had someone who would not leave them in the streets like this.
this homeless lady that i saw, was obviously literate, like us. her signs were neatly written, straight and correct. this homeless lady is a dog lover, her pet dog looks to be in a much condition then she did. and shes held on to it so she obviously love it. its probably all she has left.
and this homeless lady, wants to stay alive. even after losing what shes had, even given her impoverished condition, she wants to live.
we can complain about how shit or sad or boring our lives are, and we can complain about wanting to die cause of our break ups or too much drama in our lives of too much whatever. but these people have nothing. they do not even have their pride, their integrity, their dignity. they have to give that up to, to beg and grovel for money to stay alive.
what saddens me most is the hopelessness of the situation. when i tell people about what i saw i get "did you give her money?"
like of course, but it saddens me that for her, that is all i can do. give her money. i cant give her warmth, i cant give her love, i cant give her a home. i can only give her something to last a day.
i cant do anything. im just a girl blogging about something that makes her sad.

so im making a promise, right here right now. a promise and the only promise that i promise to keep.
if i ever make enough money, and i will strive with all my heart to make this money when im out of school, im going to open a homeless shelter. i dont know how they work, but ill figure it out when i have enough money. and im going to work there and help whoever comes. it can be like..my night job.
and if i DONT get that money, then i will at least donate every dollar i dont need to homeless shelters, and homeless people. i dunno, i just cant turn away from homeless people anymore. its been hauntingm e so much, i cant sleep all i think about is ARE THEY WARM RIGHT NOW?
because its so sad. how can you not have someone care for you? anyone!
i want to be that person, to at least care for them. it hurts so much thinking about how theyre all out there right now, trying to stay warm for this winter. that woman and her dog..how long do you think they could stnad this winter? they were sleeping so early in the night
so yeah.
im late for a phone call, goodnight